Holistic companion

To break bad habits is not merely a matter of knowledge or skill.  If it was, then all information campaigns on how to improve health would have made illnesses a thing of the past.  We would all be slim and rich and teenage girls would not get pregnant.  Sadly, many people do not create lasting changes and repeat their failures again and again.Why? How? Have you ever tried to break bad habits? The key to creating and maintaining behavioral change is in getting and staying motivated.  Some people make lifestyle changes that last a few weeks at best.  The attendance figures at health clubs in January show you the people who begin very motivated and lose the passion.  Other people wish that they could do something, but never work up the motivation to begin.  The title of comedian Totie Fields' book I Think I’ll Start on Monday: The official 8 1/2oz Mashed Potato Diet sums it up.  She also said: “I’ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I’ve lost is two weeks". Can crisis motivate us to change? Conventional theory suggests that the highest potential for change is in crisis.  This seems logical, since nothing is normal during a crisis and the abnormality is the opportunity to make important decisions about the future.  People often try to make radical shifts when they face financial or other disasters.  But if crisis really is the highest potential time for change, then why do 90% of coronary bypass patients not make long-term changes to their b... Read More

Intimate relationships can be a source of the greatest joy or pain. Valentine's Day was established by papal decree in 496AD as a day to celebrate our intimate relationships with those we love most deeply. At that time it wasn't connected with romantic love. Geoffrey Chaucer changed that in the high Middle Ages during the time of development of courtly love as a tradition. Since that time we see Valentine's Day as a shorthand for what intimate relationships or marriage should look like.  Starry-eyed, blissful, sweet, easy, sexual, and everloving might describe our expectations of intimate relationships. But like most things in life, when we truly take a look, we see much more complexity... This article gives you the opportunity to examine and learn to improve the critical moods that make or break intimate relationships. And you will be able to apply the learning to your relationships with lovers, companions, courtesans, etc.  In every marriage and intimate relationship there are moods that serve building the relationship and those that have a damaging effect. Moods are not inherently good or bad, but they either serve or restrict us in a particular situation.  Here are some that we can distinguish more clearly in intimate relationships: Compassion versus pity Compassion means being with another person in their pain. To pity is to see another person as needing us to pull them up to our level of understanding.  In compassion we place ourselves on the same human level as o... Read More